Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with one another.

Romans 12:15-16, ESV

 

Our community recently suffered a devastating loss. A young lady was involved in a tragic accident that took her life. She left behind three sons and two daughters, all in their teens, as well as her fiancé. She also left behind seven siblings and her mother. Her father had suddenly passed almost two years ago to the day that Mary died, and the family was still feeling the loss of that tragedy. While it is always difficult to deal with any type of death, it is particularly hard when the deaths are unexpected and out of season. Of course, we grieve even when we have had time to prepare ourselves for the passing of a loved one who has some terrible illness, as we do when a loved one goes on after a long life and it is simply their time to go. But when the death is like this...

 

Maybe that's why I have had such a hard time even writing about this. Even after a few weeks, it is difficult to know how to put my scattered thoughts into the right words, but I feel like I need to try, so here goes...

 

Her name was Mary, and her father's name was Kelly. I have known this family just about ever since I moved to this community some thirty years ago. I coached Mary for four years while she was in grade school and got to know most of the family pretty well. We got to know them even better when they moved across the alley from us when they were re-building after a tornado damaged their home on the other side of town. I have observed for many years how close this family is, and how happy they have been as a result of that bond. Such closeness and affection make times like this all the more difficult to bear in some ways, but it is this very closeness that is such a big part of the key to getting through such times of great tragedy.

 

And it is this very fact that I want to talk about today. 

 

Sometimes when we read the Bible, the words we read are just that - words. We acknowledge that the Bible is the Word of God, but we still struggle to make the proper application when it comes to our daily lives. But it is times like these that the importance of "doing" and not just reading is so important, for these words have the power to not only make our lives better, but also to literally rescue us when times are at their most trying. Take the passage above: Paul essentially tells us to be happy with those who are happy, and to be sad with those who are sad. He goes on to tells us to live in harmony with one another! 

 

I'm not much when it comes to music, but I do understand that when we are harmonizing when we sing, we are basically blending our voices together and trying to sing the same notes so that the song sounds as it was intended to sound. It means that we are on the same page, so to speak, in order to accomplish something that can be beautiful when we sing the right words and the right notes at the right time. 

 

I believe I have witnessed a lot of that very thing in the past two years with this family, While they would be the first to tell you that they don't always see eye to eye on everything (especially when they were kids growing up in a large family) they are also the first to see how important this harmonious living is. They really are a family that rejoices with one another when the news is good, and they sincerely and genuinely grieve with each other when one of the family is hurting. This type of support means everything when we are trying to get through such times of devastation and grief as they have been going through during these past two years.

 

But, as important as leaning on family (and friends) has been during these trying times, there is something else that is even more vital: It is turning to the Lord to let Him help you through. He tells us to come to Him when we are heavy laden with the burdens of life - He really is concerned for us, and He wants to ease our suffering! He tells us if we will do this, that we will find rest for our souls (Mtthew 11:28-30). This is the very thing that we need, when we are experiencing such a depth of grief and pain as this family has been dealing with.

 

In short, we need each other, and we need God! And, while this will not take away the heavy load of grief that times such as this bring, it will make it bearable enough for us to get through such times. And when we finally do get past these times (and we will, eventually) it is then important for us to remember to help others when their time of need arises. It is not only our duty, but it is our privilege to help others when they need it the most. This means that we have to be attentive to others enough to know when they are rejoicing and when they are weeping, so that we can join them in ways that will actually be beneficial to them. 

 

I have watched a family and a community do just that. They have rallied around one another and have made this most difficult time a bit more bearable. More importantly, they have prayed for one another, and much of the family has taken Jesus up on His magnificent offer of bringing their burdens to Him. When we live life right, when we actually do what God wants us to do, life becomes better. It doesn't mean that it becomes easy, but it does become better, and sometimes that is the best we can hope for.

 

Our part is to remember to have enough love and compassion to actually be there at the times they need us the most. We rarely know what to do during times such as these, and we certainly don't know exactly what to say - but that's okay! For, it is enough sometimes just to be there so that we can grieve with those who are grieving. There really is great comfort in having friends and family who care enough to show that they care.

 

How do we get through times such as these? Only with the help of God and those who love us. So, let's do remember to be there for one another, and let us all remember to pray!